I’m going to do something I rarely do on this blog. I’m going to share part of my journey that I haven’t fully experienced yet. I’ve sort of seen some of the foreshadowing of these things but in all honesty, I’m not really there yet. “There” being a place of understanding.
I left off in my last post recounting reflections on the first seven Stations of the Cross. Here are the other seven, as presented by Fr Tom.
Eighth Station: Reach Out To Others In Compassion. Despite the pain, exhaustion and emotional turmoil I’m experiencing myself, I reach out to others as they experience their darkness. I suppose I do this with my boys. I try to anyway.
Ninth Station: Fall On My Face Again. I’m still trying to get my feet under me from the second fall and not really looking forward to another faceplant. That being said, there is some comfort in knowing that even Jesus struggled.
Tenth Station: Stripped. I’ve seen a little of this so far and I dread seeing more of it. I’ve seen the ability to do things stripped away. Little things like handling quarters in the laundromat, picking up pieces of deli meats to make lunches or going through pages in a file can be difficult, painful and incredibly frustrating. Reading or working on the computer are no longer things I take for granted. Some days are easier than others. Harder days are coming. The old way of doing things, the old way of emotionally dealing with things and the old way of spiritually being are all being stripped away. It hurts.
Eleventh Station: Nailed To My Cross. Now the cross is an internal part of me. I can’t lay it down or run from it. It’s more than carrying it on my back. It is inextricably part of me.
Twelfth Station: Death. Not necessarily physical death, but the death of all that has been. The old ways are gone for good and the old me who started this journey is no longer.
Thirteenth Station: Cared For. Someone will come into my journey who can minister to my pain and help me as I prepare to enter into a new way of being. There is reassurance in that.
Fourteenth Station: Rest. It will take time to rest and reflect for me to enter into the new way of being. This can be weeks, months or even years but a new being will emerge after time alone in the darkness and quiet.
These stations are part of everyone’s story, not just mine. I share what Fr Tom shared with us because he so beautifully made the Stations of the Cross so real for me right here, right now. I know what’s coming and yes, I’m experiencing fear and dread, but I haven’t forgotten Easter is coming. The story doesn’t end at the tomb. It starts there.
Stations of the Cross reflection was presented at St. James Roman Catholic Church by Fr. Tom Lynch. I am so very blessed to have been there to hear him.